In a BTS video that has not, and may never, get posted, I literally said to the camera, I don’t want to do this.
And I was not lying.
April was a rough month for me. After weeks of back pain, I had lost all mobility (to the point I couldn’t even put socks on or wash my face) and finally went to see a chiropractor and learned I had a slipped disc in my spine. By the time this session came around, I was getting slightly better, still not great though, but was wrestling with how much of my self-love was tied around my ability to run and move.
Much more on that another day, but in short, I was not feeling great about myself and the last thing I wanted to do was do my hair and makeup and get dressed cute and go take pictures.
But I was adamant about sticking to this project so on the last possible day, I got out my gear and made it happen.
Pre-slipped disc, I had a much more elaborate plan for April, but that wasn’t going to happen so I swapped that session and opted for a simple white sheet set up in the backyard. This kind of session was SUPER popular a few years ago and even though it’s not exactly trendy now, it’s still cute and most importantly, it was easy for this month.
I did my best to try to hype myself up, but the second I started shooting, pretty much everything fell apart.
The tripod would not hold up the camera and the weight of the lens kept pulling it slowly down, the sheet kept blowing around (and not in a cute way), and Oakly, who was out in the backyard with me, would not stop barking at literally everything.
In short, it was a disaster. And I hated every single image. (Well, except for the few with Oakly.)
I always tell my clients or friends if they don’t feel good in the moment when the picture was taken, it doesn’t matter how perfect their hair and makeup is, how cute the outfit is, how stunning the lighting is or how beautiful the scenery is. If you feel terrible when the shutter clicked, you’re not going to like the image.
More than ever, I felt that in this session. That’s an added bonus in doing this project, a reminder of what it feels like to be in front of the camera.
Looking at the images after some time has passed, I really don’t hate them, but I definitely don’t love them. I didn’t feel any sort of need to share them or post them, and am certainly not exactly proud of them.
I’ll probably end up re-doing this session at some point in the future because I do like the concept and think it’s a cute idea, and if everything works properly, should be fairly easy to execute.
In the meantime, I’m going to take the lessons, especially the technical ones, and hope for best in May.